Tiger Woods spoke today for the first time since he's been found out! And as a wife, mother and woman, I am trying to sort out my feelings for all of this.
Crime vs punishment. The public hero vs the private man. What to know and where to let go. I imagine everyone has an opinion on this. And I imagine I have mine as well. Mine yet is not so self defined and that's why I want to write it out...to find out. (I've always believed that if you're willing to take the time and write your feelings, they'll eventually sort themselves out on the page...we'll see). The media is obsessed with the “fall from grace”. I think to a tremendous extent, they create the monster. It starts with a person with unusual talent. And as we can witness all this week and next at the olympics, talent is not enough, an incredible need to achieve through hard work and dedication takes that talent to the top. You don't get there if you don't really want it or work at it. So Tiger became a legitimate hero. And the media loves to love somebody. The frenzy begins. They want to be associated with the hero. They want to be the first with the hero news. They want the hero to be there for them. And there's a lot of media. Think about it. All the TV, all the sports talk shows radio and TV, magazines of all shapes and sorts and specialties, newspapers in city after city, advertisers who want to capitalize on the hero's popularity, social media,
paparazzi and all of us individuals with our phone cameras, etc. And that's really just the tip of the iceberg!
It's like watching a video game where the media is pumping, pumping, pumping to build a person up as high as they can possibly go until whooooosh...hey look at that guy free fall. Wow! Let's do it again! That's what I see. And that's what I see with Tiger Woods. He's just a man. He's just human. Yes he's talented and hardworking, an amazing golfer, but he's just human like you and me. He's not a god and we shouldn't make him our idol whether we're in the media or listening to the media. But everybody wants to be Tiger. Beautiful wife, beautiful life, lots of talent, lots of fame, lots of money! Tiger, you have so much, we insist that you share it all with us. What the media didn't like about Tiger is that he didn't share much at all.
So Tiger got caught and his path of destruction revealed, bit by bit, to the world. Do I need to know all this? Do my kids who watch way to much Sportscenter need to know all this? Is it now in my best interest to know all the gory details? What good will that do? What is the redeeming goal? Or is that proper punishment? Does he deserve that? Is that the way we say, “hey you were great. You were the best. You were my idol. But now you're the worst.” Is that the way we level out the playing field? I'm just curious that's all. I'm certainly as appalled and amazed at the behavior he managed to hide from the world for years on end. Can you imagine escaping all that media attention for so long? When Tiger Woods confessed today, he made it a point to say how he felt entitled, how he put himself in another league, in another world where maybe behavior like this was okay for people like him and now he realizes that that's not okay for anyone no matter how adulated or ignored you happen to be.
We hold our heroes to high standards, but yet because of who they are and where they are, they are in a place where they are given a lot of things. People and companies are eager to be seen and appreciated in their presence and strive for their attention. I can see where a celebrity would get the impression that they are entitled. It would be hard not to when the world seems to be handing you that right. Where a woman who might not notice you as an ordinary citizen sees your celebrity and views you as a prize. I blame Tiger, but I also blame this worldly world. How would you do in that setting? It's good gossip. No it's great gossip. How can you not talk about it? How can you not want to know. How miserable is his wife, really? How ashamed and sorry is he? Will he do it again? What about all those other women? Look at his crushed mother watching on. Can't wait to hear every detail of their stories. Again, I think it's human nature to paint ourselves always in the best light and cast others in the worst light. So even if you get the “real story”, it's really suspect anyway.
In a radio discussion I listened to yesterday, Tiger was criticized for not coming out as a man and meeting the media and confessing his wrongs. I don't agree or like what Tiger did, but I don't like living his pain on the TV screen either. I guess it's pretty good punishment. But when you get to that place, time with the media couldn't possibly help in the PR area, no matter which way you go, whatever decision you make it will be wrong. This discussion I was listening to moved on to his wife and whether she would be standing at his side or not? If she was going to be there, it would be wrong of him to ask that much. If she was not...oh bad news for him. Speculation. The fact that Tiger didn't talk to anybody after the revelation may have been a good thing. It might make him more honest about his resolve to change if he goes out and works on himself first.
What surprises me most? Everyone acting like this has never been done before! Like no other (entitled) celebrity has ever cheated! Give me a break! It's more likely that they're all doing it! There are a lot of feelings, beliefs, questions I have about so many things, but one thing I'm pretty positive about. The person you are today is a result of the books you read and the people you hang out with. What you put in your head and what other people put in your head MATTER!
I hope Tiger's marriage gets back on track. I hope he can win at solving his personal issues. I hope wounds can heal. And I hope the media will find a more important issue to put their resources to work at. When it comes to judgement, I really don't want to be involved. And as it so eloquently states in the bible, “he who is without sin, cast the first stone.”
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