MomTime TV

It is 4:51 in the morning and for the third night in a row, I have been awake since about 2.

On nights like this, I used to lay in bed feeling frustrated - tossing and turning, stealing the sheets from my husband and staring at him and noticing how sweet he looks in the dark - hoping to eventually fall back asleep.

But lately, I take it as a sign to get out of bed and see what I am being called to focus on for the moment. Today, it is clear that my focus is on my girlfriends.

With the glimmer of light from the moon (and my monitor) lighting the way, I have been sending numerous emails to let friends know that I am thinking of them. As I hit "send" on the last one, I began to connect consciously about what I had just done and sat in full appreciation for how fortunate and blessed I am for such abundant relationships.

Being a mother of three children (15, 13 and 2 yrs) and having my own business, I find that I don't spend a lot of traditional time with my friends. Things like seeing a movie, meeting at the mall, discussing the latest issue of O Magazine, recounting last night's episode of Desperate Housewives, or playing in the monthly Bunco game are not high on my "girlfriend time" hot list. Although I enjoy spending time like these with friends on occasion, they are not things I choose to do on a regular basis.

So, if I don't see myself as the traditional friend, then what or who am I?

Does this mean that I don't have any real friends?

Of course not.

I am abundantly blessed with friendships - even though we may not fit into a typical mold. Here are a few examples of my friendships and the kinds of things we do together....

My "Quest" Girlfriends Every two weeks, for the past year, Elise and Darlene and I have met, by phone. We simply come together and "hang out". I guess it is kind of like a virtual "Saturday morning coffee group" since we meet at the same day/time every other week. The difference here is that we are make our own coffee (and get to stay in our pajamas) because we call into a conference line from our respective states - Arizona, Missouri, and Wisconsin.

We are on the phone for an hour each time we connect. Sometimes we laugh, sometimes we cry and most of the time, we do both! It is our special time together and I deeply cherish these women. We celebrate, vent, support, make fun of, and love each other as if we were next-door neighbors. Recently, we met up in San Diego for a coaches training. We shared a room for 4 days and it was the first time we had ever been together "live" and in-person for more than 15 minutes. We got along beautifully, gave each other needed space, and giggled like we were in the 7th grade. Saturday is our first Quest Call, since our slumber party. I can't wait!

My Accountability Buddies Nancy, Jenifer, Raj, Karen,  Joyce, and Peter (yes, a man). I meet with these awesome people on a scheduled 1 on 1 basis...
Nancy and I support each other in building our businesses and creating a clear plan of action to succeed. We are currently working our way through each chapter of Michael Port's book "Book Yourself Solid". Nancy and I met 15 years ago through a business-school partnership and knew that we shared a special bond, even back then. Our paths went different ways for almost 10 years - up until 1 1/2 years ago when we serendipitously ran into each other at a retreat.

Jenifer and I have just published our first book together and are now learning how to market and publicly share our book. Every Friday, for at least 30 minutes for the past 2 years, Jen and I have been laser focused on bringing Maddie Moonbeam's Gardeninto this world. We both look back in amazement at our own growth and accomplishments over the course of our friendship - which was formed in partnership with Jen as the illustrator and me as the author.

Adrianna, Joyce, Raj, Karen and Peter and I connect less frequently but each time we do, we hold each other accountable to showing up in big ways in this world and living our lives in alignment with our personal integrity.

Thank God for free long distance calling because these incredible buddies represent many different places around our world, including: Michigan, California, Arizona, Mexico, Nova Scotia, Sweden and Illinois.

My Service Provider Friends Ew! I know, it is an awful name to describe these kinds of friendships, but you get the picture.... Dr. Shari & staff (my chiropractor team for 5 yrs); Elaine (my hairdresser of 10 yrs); Brian, Brenda and Rob (my Postal Annex team); Kim (my AQ coach); and, my amazing and dedicated clients - are all people I call friends.

Yes, I pay for their services and they pay me for mine; but most importantly, I deeply value their contribution to my life. We've been through pregnancies, divorce, illness, recovery, break ups, marriages, career changes, loss of loved ones and all the other ups and downs that life has to offer. Once a week or once a month, in-person, by phone and email, we connect quickly and intimately as if we spent every day together.

"I grew up with you and I will grow old with you" Friends My high school friends, my teaching buddies, the friends I know because our kids introduced us, my sister-in-laws... YOU ALL KNOW WHO YOU ARE!!

These are the women who have helped shape my life and motivate me to be the woman, mother, wife, and leader that I am today.

We may only see each other a few times per year but anyone of them would drop what they are doing and come to my rescue if I needed them AND I will do the same for YOU.

MomTime TV Moms. Although I only see most of you via Facebook and Twitter or for the quick 30 minutes while filming our show. I have come to really appreciate each and every one of you. The conversations we’ve had and the information we share is incredible. I look forward to being with you again soon.

My BFF Bernice. We have been friends for more than 16 years. You are my sister and my earth angel. Like all of my other friendships, ours is not traditional. We can go months without seeing each other or even talking on the phone and then we come together again and pick up right where we left off. You are the one who, like Jiminy Cricket, sits on my shoulder and reminds me of my greatness and to remain humble.
There is something magical about my friends. Untraditional, perhaps but certainly abundant and mutually fulfilling.

May God continue to bless each of you. Thank you for your unique contribution to my life.

*footnote: I started writing this BLOG in the wee early hours several days ago and eventually, I had to get on with my day before I could finish it. Then, after I wrote it, realized that no one else would care to read it and didn't post it. I had written it for myself.

Oh well, isn't that what Blogs are anyway? Just stuff that we think is important - even if there is no audience.

As I mentioned early on in this entry, I am consciously aware that friendship was my focus for that day. It is a special awareness I continue to hold.

As I recount my interactions with my friends, since writing this blog, each hello, goodbye and I love you, has brought more joy and awareness into my heart.

I would love to hear from you. Who are you friends and what makes them special?



Karen Nowicki is a successful family communication and wellness coach, author, speaker and founder of MotherDaughterWeekends.com. Her children’s book, Maddie Moonbeam’s Garden, is an inspirational tribute to each person’s journey toward self acceptance. She is a regular contributor to Little Pink Book and weekly guest on AZTV7 Cable 13’s MomTime TV.  Before opening her own coaching business, Karen was a teacher, assistant principal, and vice president for public and charter schools. Karen lives in Chandler, AZ with her husband, Mike, and her three children (two teens and a two year old).

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